If you are presently in a crisis and/or feeling suicidal, you will find a list of telephone numbers and /or email addresses below of caring volunteers. Though these volunteers have received some training, they are not mental health professionals and are not a substitute for professional assistance. They are not and am not assuming the role of your physician or therapist. They are also not aware of your medical problems and psychiatric diagnoses, which usually has a dramatic effect on medication and other treatment recommendations. You must make a medical and treatment plan with your physician and therapist.

However most of these volunteers have psychiatric diagnoses and have been in the trenches just as you are now. They truly know and understand how much pain you are in. They have been screened and report that they are well into recovery and are stable. You too can find this stability in your life, but right now, let's get you out of crisis and out of risk for self harm.

Feel free to call any one of these people only during the days and hours that they list as being available. Calling them any other time is not acceptable unless you have their direct permission. 

You must call direct. No collect calls will be accepted unless the person's bio states it is ok. Please do not ask the volunteers to call you back unless you read it in their bio.

If you do not own a phone, I suggest buying a "phone card" and using a pay phone or a friend's phone. 

If you are drunk or high you are still encouraged to call if you feel you are at risk of harming yourself. However no abusive behavior will be tolerated and your call will end immediately.

The times listed below are all Eastern Standard Time, United States of America.

14) Tiki from Boston, Massachusetts. She is fluent in English, Spanish and Japanese.
Email: tiki_2003@hotmail.com Phone number: 617-352-6827
Will take calls from 11am to 8pm, everyday, when I am in my room. If I am not in my room, please leave a message and I will get back at you as soon as I can.

My name is Tiki, I am 19, and a college student in Boston. My life has pretty much been a rollercoaster as long as I can remember. I thought it always normal when I used to have these extreme highs and defined it as some type of hyperactivity. But then I would also have these downfalls, in which all my energy would be gone, leaving me feeling literally hopeless and lifeless.

During this latter period, I would exclude myself from usual activities and isolate myself in my room, sleeping most of the time. I seemed to be okay when I used to live at home, for I would always turn to my parents who provided me with a warm home full of love and care. 

Life took a turn when I came to college last year and started my life among strangers. I would have less "high periods" and would most often stay in my room sleeping. Eventually, my grades suffered, I isolated myself from friends and began to be enveloped by absolute misery. Nothing seemed to help. A close friend of mine then advised me to go see a psychiatrist on campus. At first I was reluctant. I didn't think anything could help me. All my other friends saw my moods as something passing, that I could simply sleep over and the next day it would be gone. But it was nothing like that. I finally ended up going to the psychiatrist, who after sessions, diagnosed me with Bipolar Disorder. 

I was put on medication (Zoloft) and even though results could not be seen immediately, which once drove me to an attempt to end my life, slowly I started to gain strength from the support of my closest friends and perhaps the encouragement that I finally began to find within myself. I remember when I think about my days back then how important it was for someone to simply listen to me, without saying a word, just listening and understanding what I was going through and not just dismissing it as some sadness that everyone goes through. 

 I guess what was important was that I was depressed and that was what was causing the dysfunctions in my life and not the dysfunctions in my life causing my sadness. It's a big difference and a lot of people fail to see it. Without a doubt, last year was the worst experience in my life. Perhaps my life would have been easier if I didn't have to go through what I went. But I think everything has a silver lining. 

I think this experience made me stronger, more mature, more observing, and even more sensitive towards my own needs and that of others. I do not think about ending my life anymore because there is so much in life even when things are not going that great, and when you are not feeling good, there are always people who care and will reach out for you. It's up to you to open up and reach out for them. So if you are feeling sad or just need some company, please pick up the phone and call. Thanks.

 

16) Adam, native of Connecticut. I will accept only e-mail from people and in suicidal situations my voice mail may be contacted at: 203-501-7563. A short (30 sec.) voice-message may be left including your name (first only is fine), phone number including area and your situation; I will call back ASAP. My e-mail is: start77@webtv.net. I am 25 years old.

Some of the mental health issues that I currently suffer from are: borderline personality disorder, OCD, major depression, body dysmorphic disorder and ADD. I am currently in treatment and stable, though my energy levels are low but this continues to improve.

I have suffered from these problems all my life and have been treated, mostly unsuccessfully for most of them­­as most of us have. 

I am very aware of the pain and turmoil of BPD and its comorbid conditions, having lived it and been subject to the mental health community; a lack of financial resources and despair at lack of efficacy of most of its "standard" treatments. I'm caring and empathetic, but do have firm boundaries. Successful treatment is out there, though it sometime takes time to find it.

In addition, I have survived hepatitis-B and am aware of its impact on people, as well as its impact on depression and BPD.

18) Deanna from Canada. Email volunteer only:  deannamp@attcanada.ca

My name is Deanna and I live in Alberta Canada. I have been diagnosed with BPD, however that was like 9 years ago. I have been well for 3 1/2 years now, I do not take any medications anymore. I have been in the place where I have had to call a crisis line myself. I am 25 years old, and there were some pretty desperate calls I made.

19)  Neal from Maryland. Email volunteer. diverneal@yahoo.com  

I have been diagnosed with Bi-polar Disorder, Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, Acute Anxiety Disorder, Depression and prone to panic attacks...these are in conjunction with a multitude of medical problems which stem from an injury while volunteer fire-fighting. ( Heart Dysrthmyia, COPD, Dyspnea, Tumors, multiple surgeries for tumor and breast removal...Migraines...Chronic Asthma...just a brief descript).

I am on various meds for theses disorders and used to attend an out-patient day program and then rehabilitation program at our college to help me adjust so I could return to work.

There was one "attempt" about 6-7 years ago involving a rifle but fortunately the weapon jammed and I regained a sense of focus and contacted my doctor. There have been no other attempts since that time. To date I am considered stable but I do have challenging days.

My teenage daughter has also been diagnosed (about 4 years ago) with Bi-polar Disorder. She was into self-mutilation, self destructive behavior, drugs, free sex, rebellious actions. She was hospitalized x 2 with in a year, almost to the date.

20) Jeneane from Ohio. Email volunteer. RainbowGloryRay@aol.com 

I am a 20 year old female that has been through many problems and still deals with things today. My parents were divorced when I was nine years old and my father moved away and got a new family. At ages ten through fifteen I was most depressed, reading and contemplating the meaning of life and if god wanted me here. 

When I was fifteen I became the rebel and spent the next two years in and out of jail, detention homes, and even a stay at a prison in New York. Then I spent a few months in rehab, and a year and a half in the program trying to find my "niche". 

My senior year of high school was a party and I barely graduated but the day I learned I would get my diploma my life changed. When I told my mom I was graduating she started to cry and couldn't even talk to me. After that I took a look at my life and thought, "What the hell am I gonna do with myself?" Since then I have been learning and discovering things about myself everyday. 

The totally dependent person I once was now enjoys quiet evenings alone and sometimes yearns for them. I have become a good listener and a real humanitarian. I have learned to say, "I forgive you," and "I'm sorry." So if you'd like to write to me I'd love to listen and be your friend. Thanks.